On the second day of our arrival we had a chance to go to "陳家B" - a village that was devastated by the earthquake. We went to a supermarket the day before and thought that we could buy some oil for the villagers. It turned out to be a non trivial task for the team and teacher L. The reason is very simple. With the plan to buy over hundred bottles of oil, we practically empty the oil stock of that supermarket. We spent a few hours sorting out all the details and finally got all the oil we needed. However the store manager was so stressed out that she actually shed tears when we were done shopping ... I don't know what exactly happened but at that moment I felt weird because it looked like we'd caused trouble to the workers and the manager in the store ... I wish we did spend some time to talk to the manager to at least understand her feelings.
We arrived CJB that day but somehow there seemed to be some changes to the original arrangement and we needed to wait for people to come for the oil delivery. And I was told that there could actually be corruption in terms of delivering resources. So we really want to deliver the materials face to face instead of going through the middle men. However it was easier said than done since we are not familiar to the area and we don't speak the language so it is hard to not rely on the local people. It is really sad that there are still corruptions at times when they should help each other instead of being selfish. Might be this is the real disaster ...
On the second day we decided to visit 北川. After 3 hours bumpy ride we arrived BC. The ride
was really bumpy. I hit my head and shoulder couple times and even my internal organs can feel the shocks. Teacher C sat next to me and for most of the time he enjoyed singing hymns by himself and seldom talked to us. I tried to start some conversations but he didn't seem to understand my mandarin and I didn't quite get what he said because of his 河南 Putonghua.
When we finally arrived the place, we were stopped by the army. We were told that the area is now a restricted area and nobody (at least cars) is allowed to be in that area. After some conversations (I was amazed by how teacher T did that) we were allowed to enter that area (only for a while) with our cars outside the gate and only for a while. So we quickly walked in the ruined village and thought we should be back shortly. However we were all taken aback by what we saw along the way. And we started to slowed down. The whole scene is just like one of those nightmares that we were among fallen buildings and broken bridges but we couldn't do anything about it. There is one building with the whole first floor collapsed vertically into the ground and that building is now one floor less!! there are buildings tilted with such an angle that I think with a slight touch they are all going to fall. 
At that moment I just felt death is so close. This place is just lifeless. There are buildings that are totally covered up by sands and mud and I think so are the people inside. I am not sure how many of the people who died in the earthquake actually heard of the gospel. And I am not sure how many of them are believers. However for those who hadn't seized the chance to turn to Christ are dead eternally. "When you are not certain what will take place tomorrow. What is your life? It is a mist, which is seen for a little time and then is gone" (James 4:14). Very much like the financial tsunami, it all happened in a blink of an eye.
Many of the furniture and household stuff inside those apartments were still there as if the earthquake just happened yesterday. They were just frozen there. Everyone had heavy feelings and we all walked slowly to a place that buried over tens of thousands of bodies. We said a short prayer there. Many cried and especially for those field workers from areas close by it was very hard for them to stay calm. I just remember that I didn't say a word on my way back to the gate. I don't even want to take more pics or videos (though I was supposed to since I was the camera man). I was 
thinking what is the significance of being able to get by the security line and to witness the impacts of the earthquake. How did God feel for the whole thing? Was God indifferent about all the loss of lives and souls? There were two thoughts: "If you, then, being evil, are able to give good things to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who make requests to him?" (Matthew 7:11) Our Heavenly father must be heart-broken as well, and in a greater magnitude. Suddenly I remember Jesus wept over the death of Lazarus. Our God is full of emotions and His will is never to destroy but to build. We were there, standing on top of the rubble and bricks and buried bodies, not to just feel the pain of the victims and their families, but also the heart of Jesus. Not to just mourn over the sorrowful past but to strike for a joyful future. Not to focus on the dead but to concentrate on the survivors. To me it seems that God was trying to convey the message that we are part of this plan, we are invited to feel His passion (and pain) over the people and to be involved in His work in China.
My second thought is "And the rain came down and there was a rush of waters and the winds were driving against that house; and it came down and great was its fall." (Matthew 7:27) Yes all the houses and schools fell with great crashes!! Many lives wouldn't be perished if these buildings were built with honesty, faithfulness, the fear of God ... This is a lesson for all of us, not just those who are in the business of building home/church/school. We are in one way or the other creating disasters for others (and ourselves) if we are greedy, selfish, careless, 得過且過,因循苟且 ... In His eyes, we are all entrusted to give Him the best at work, at home, in school etc. Don't be lukewarm water!!I don't remember what happened for the rest of the day ... It must be a 3 hours bumpy ride back ... oh actually we came across more broken bridges and buried villages ...
